Baseball is so boring that i's literally starting to kill people.
He always wanted to be a pilot, and he was for a very short time there.
Cop might be off base here, looks like an accident to me
"Oh well,guess I'll just go to work then..."
His fortune cookie did say "You'll shit your pants today".
Good thing this shit didn't happen to the Beatles.
Well, now there's a new and innovative way to go about being a Peeping Tom.
He lost the race, therefore his honor, so he took his own life...It's a culture thing. The way of the Samurai. (Except the pilot was American and actually survived).
"Walk it off" is the national motto in Russia.
My money is on a woman...an old woman...an old Asian woman...an old blind Asian woman...an old blind Asian woman texting...an old blind Asian woman texting and smoking crack.
"Move bitch, I'm a bus!"
It's the all new Toyota Martyr.
In Soviet Russia, you don't check overhead obstructions. Overhead obstructions check you.
Lets just pretend that they were running to get help.
Later that day they all won the lottery jackpot...playing different numbers.
There are enough things trying to kill you on the Russian roads without you needing to create more for yourself.
Turns out, seatbelts actually are a good idea. Whooda thought it?
Ooo so close to sticking that landing. I give him 7.8.
Shit, guess my shipment of Russian mail order brides is going to be late.
He must have been sick all of the 297 days when we were told in school never to cross a road when your sight is blocked.